Of B-Pride And B-Prejudice

Over lunch today I was talking with a buddy who used to be in showbiz. Granted, it was several years ago, and it was on the Springer Show, but it was showbiz.

As we were talking about entertainment stuff I decided to let him in on my “other” job – writing. He was both intrigued and excited as I told him about our potential/semi/pseudo-success with SEIGE, which may or may not someday get made.

“It sounds like fun… I’d love to read it!” he enthused.

Oddly, I didn’t feel quite so excited. “I dunno,” I hemmed, “its still in a funky contractual limbo… I hate to really have anyone else look at it.”

He wasn’t convinced. “Come on! It’s just me. I’m not going to show it to anyone, or copy the idea or anything. I just think it’d be fun to read.”

Having hemmed, I decided to try hawing. “It’s just a b-movie, you know. Full of big action flick clichés and over the top dialogue. We tried to have fun with it, but there’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”

Rather than shaking him off the scent, he only got more excited.

“Do you blow up something big? Maybe a plane or a helicopter or something cool?”

“A helicopter,” I weakly replied.

“Kickass! And does your hero have to like… I dunno… save a buddy or his kid or wife or something, like in COMMANDO?”

I sighed. “His wife.”

“YES! And is there a Mexican standoff?!”

I felt like I was talking dirty to Pat O’Brien or something. He was just way too into it. Thing is, I think my buddy actually really digs B-action-movies, and was genuinely excited and interested.

But me? I hate to say it, but I was feeling pretty embarrassed. I mean… we know, and have acknowledged here and elsewhere, that SEIGE is very much a b-movie. Hell, there’s a reason we named this blog what we did. But for some reason, the idea of this guy reading the screenplay made my skin crawl.

I’m proud of SEIGE, in the context of what it is. We were given pretty specific conditions for the location, characterizations, market… even the title. So, for a b-action-movie, I think it’s a fun little script. We tried to create some entertaining action sequences starring some larger-than-life heroes and villains.

But without that context (or without seeing it on-screen at 3 in the morning on TNT), I’m afraid it’ll come off as… I dunno… “B.” Maybe I’m being overly sensitive. Lots of people like what generally qualify as “b” movies. He certainly seemed to.

Regardless, I told him no. He seemed disappointed, but I promised to get him a copy of the DVD if it ever actually gets funded/cast/shot/edited/printed/screened/pressed. I’m hoping the final product will make us proud, and they’ll do our little script justice.

If not, though, at least I’ll have the reassurance of knowing that we’ve been paid as I wince, watching him toss SEIGE into his DVD player.

Charlie

Keywords: b movie, Siege, screenwriting, screenplay, scriptwriter